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News Flash: every couple argues. In college I had learned about the "magic" 5:1 ratio (I studied Marriage and Family Therapy). This means that there has to be five positive interactions to every one negative for a successful, happy marriage. It's like an emotional savings account or a "reservoir of positive feeling." Recently I was watching some random, low-budget talk show on PBS. The guest was a Marriage Therapist. I had an "Ah-ha Moment" (Oprah and me). The therapist said: every married couple has an average of nine issues that will never get resolved. The key is not to dwell on these issues but to add positives. "Oh... I see," (me thinking).
This isn't to say that major issues shouldn't be addressed. However, maybe we shouldn't dwell so much on those just-kind-of-annoying issues. You can still complain to your girlfriends, there just has to be a lot more good stuff in your marriage. Have you said five nice things to your husband today?
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